Do I Miss You?
by Moonlight Enchantments
Summary: A mainly Reela centred songfic, based on the song by the feeling called Miss You. It's a hiddne track, but absolutly lovely! Three years after S13 Hope hosts a County Reunion...


**A/N This is a different Song Fic from all the others I've done, usually I don't really like ones where the characters are singing, but with this song it just seemed to fit. I don't know if it will work, but I'd definitely like to hear your thoughts in your reviews!!! It's set after Season 13, a few years after... and unfortunately S13 went as planned. But I hope you'll enjoy my "ending" for the Roomies and the others...**

Do I Miss You?

Neela smoothed out her dress as Pratt helped her out of the cab. He smiled at her, and held out his arm. They walked in to the hotel together, she gave a quick look behind her, at the starlit Chicago night, this was her last chance to run. But she didn't want to.

Pratt laughed as he pointed out the banner over the doorway. "Welcome Back County Docs and Nurses!"

"I wonder who's idea that was?" he asked, softly.

Neela smiled at him, grateful to him for trying to lighten the mood. He was the only one from County she really kept in touch with. After her accident at the rally she'd moved back to England. Gates had tried to persuade her to stay, he'd said he'd take care of her. But she didn't want him to, she wanted to take care of herself for once. Abby hadn't wanted her to leave either, but she'd been supportive. Though they'd drifted over the past three years, Neela was looking forward to seeing her old friend and hoped she'd be able to meet Joe and Holly before she flew back to England the next week.

Pratt had picked her up from the airport, and she'd been staying with him. He hadn't mentioned Ray, not once, though he'd alluded to the past, making it clear that if she wanted to talk he was there. She hadn't been sure how she'd feel returning to Chicago, but she was glad she was here. No matter how scary it was going to be, she knew running away wasn't the answer any more.

She didn't count moving to England as running away. She had tried to call him, tried to stay in Chicago without him. But he had been the one to run this time. Not that she blamed him. Her own guilt was far too strong to place any guilt on anyone else, especially not him.

They walked into the large reception hall, so gorgeously decorated, and her breath caught in her throat. Hope had organised this event, and Neela couldn't help but be reminded of the last event she'd been to organised by Hope.

"Wow, it's beautiful isn't it?" Greg said. Though Neela had no doubts he knew the true reason she was gasping.

"Mmm, it really is. It was such a good idea."

"It'll be nice to see everyone. Swap horror stories and all..." Greg trailed off. "Neela, I don't know if he'll be here. Hope says she wrote to everyone who's worked at County over the past 15 years or so."

Neela nodded, "I know. I'll be alright Greg. Don't worry about me, I'm much stronger now."

"I know you are." He did know. He was extremely proud of the woman she'd become. So different from the meek intern that had started at County all those years ago. "Come on, let's see if Abby and Kovac are here."

Neela had received the invitation to the "County Reunion" about a month ago. Hope had sent out invites early so that everyone, no matter where in the world they lived, would have no excuse to not turn up.

And the hall was packed, Neela saw some vaguely familiar faces, but none were the one she was most hoping and dreading seeing.

"Neela!" She heard a squeal and turned, to be enveloped by Haleh, "Look at you girl, you're looking gorgeous!"

"Thanks," she said quietly, "So do you! Are you still at County?"

"Goodness, no! I finally retired, after a bit of a strike over pensions."

Neela grinned, "I'm glad to hear it."

"Actually most people have moved on from County. After Moretti took over it just wasn't the same. Too many of the old faces had gone, you know? They were changing the ER and I guess people just didn't want it to be changed." She paused, looking reflective, "But anyway, how are you? Still into surgery?"

"Yeah, I'm working at a hospital in England, near London."

"That's great, I'm so happy for you."

Neela took a seat next to Pratt who was talking animatedly to a Chinese woman. After a few moments Neela remembered her as Dr Chen, the one woman to even put the notion of settling down into Greg's head. She heard a British accent behind her, and turned automatically. It belonged to a tall woman, with blonde curly hair. She was talking to a familiar man.

"Doctor Carter!" Neela said, jumping up to greet him with a hug.

"Neela, hi, oh I'd like you to meet Elizabeth Corday. She's an English surgeon like you. Liz, this is Neela Rasgotra, I used to teach her."

"Hi," Neela said, smiling.

"Pleased to meet you. Are you a surgeon at County or..."

"No," Neela shook her head, "I moved back to England a few years ago."

"Yeah, the surgery department never was as fun as the ER," Elizabeth said with a small smile.

"I didn't know you'd moved back, Neela," Carter said.

"Mmm, after... a while I just needed to go home."

Carter nodded, sensing there was probably more to the story. "I understand completely."

"Are you still in Africa?"

"Well actually, I'd just moved back to Chicago when I got this invite. I'm hoping to get another job at County, it'll be a shame not to see your familiar face. From what I hear, Morris is the only one that I'll recognise."

"Greg said that he and Hope are the only people still working there. Greg's opening a clinic a little way out of Chicago. He says he's had enough of Emergency Medicine but I don't know how long he'll last before he gets bored."

Carter laughed, "Yeah I'm not sure if he'll cope in somewhere as slow paced as that."

* * *

Later on into the evening, after a lovely 3 course meal, and more than few bottles of wine, Hope stepped onto the small stage at the front of the hall.

"Hello everyone. I know not everyone will recognise me, I'm pretty new by County standards, but I organised this event because County has meant a lot to many people over the years. I know its made me a lot of new friends and my husband and I met at County. I know a lot of couples can claim the same."

Neela glanced round, there was Abby and Luka, Greg and Jing-Mei even, she saw other couples glancing at each other with smiles, and Liz Corday had a smile on her face.

Hope continued, "But I guess there was an ulterior motive for this gathering. An old friend contacted me and together we planned this. I don't know if it was the right thing, people often tell me I shouldn't meddle, but I couldn't help myself."

Everyone looked confused, even Morris. What was Hope talking about? Then the lights dimmed a little and someone walked onto the stage. He had a slight limp but apart from that no-one would notice. Neela felt a lot of eyes suddenly turn towards her, but she couldn't keep her eyes from the man on stage. He sat down at the piano and began to play a familiar tune. She couldn't place it at first, then remembered it as a song by The Feeling, a band she'd once been a little obsessed with. He'd constantly nagged at her to listen to something else, but when she liked a band she tended to overplay them a little.

This particular song was a hidden track. She remembered the first time she'd heard it. She had the album on as they were playing a board game, scrabble maybe? Anyway, it had eventually finished and there was silence as she considered what letter's to use.

"Neela," he said, oh so quietly. And he'd looked at her with such... passion. But back then she'd still been married to Michael, she couldn't admit her feelings. And then this song had started, making them both jump after a few minutes of near silence.

She was jolted back to the present as he began to sing. His voice was so... beautiful. She almost wanted to cry just hearing it. She realised then how much she had missed him.

"_Everyone knows it, can you deny it? I was the only one for you. Everyone know it, 'cause we couldn't hide it, nobody else got close, it's true."_

"Neela, are you ok?" Greg whispered. She nodded, despite the tears rolling down her cheeks. She'd always had a soft spot for songs with pianos. But this... this was totally different.

"_My love was stronger than you think, and it's much stronger now I've had a dream..." _He looked up then, his eyes searching the tables. She kept her face turned up, despite the almighty temptation to look away, to run once more. She wasn't running this time.

His eyes locked on hers as he sang "_I hope you know that I miss you, and I wonder where you've been. And I wonder who you've seen, and I hope that he's a friend." _

She nodded and tried to smile, despite the tears.

"_Do I miss you? Yeah, do I miss you? Yeah... Well I wonder where you've been, and I hope you're with a friend."_

She stood up suddenly, drawing even more attention towards her. But for once stage fright didn't even enter her mind. All she could see was him and his piano. All she could hear was his song. _Their_ song. She walked towards the stage as he continued to sing.

"_Everyone knows it, so don't you deny it, we had it all layed out... for two."_

She stepped onto the stage.

"_Everyone knows it, 'cause we couldn't hide it, I was the sea and the sky... was you."_ He glanced down at the keys, breaking their eye contact. But she didn't stumble. For once she knew exactly where she was going, she wasn't running away from anything, she was walking towards the best thing to ever happen to her. "_All of a sudden, the wind just changed direction, and that big black cloud came rolling in."_

They'd had many black clouds. Her marriage to Michael. Her moving out. Michael's death and the loss of their friendship. His accident. Him moving away. Her moving away. Now though, they were both back in Chicago, for nothing else apart from each other.

"_I hope you know that I miss you, and I wonder where you've been, and I wonder who you've seen, and I hope that he's a friend. Do I miss you? Yeah... do I miss you? Yeah. I wonder who you've seen, and I hope that he's a friend."_

"I miss you too, Ray" she whispered. He barely heard her. But it was enough. He made a gesture with his head, as he finished the song, telling her to come sit next to him. She did, and with the eyes of everyone who'd ever found love at County and lost love at County, they leaned towards each other.

* * *

Almost a week later they walked through the corridors of the ER together. Everyone had been right, after they'd left it really had changed. The ER had changed plenty over the years but it had always been a gradual thing. With so many important players leaving at once, it had become somewhere different. Not the home everyone had once thought it. But it would always have memories for them.

They'd decided that night, that wherever they lived it wouldn't be Chicago. There was too much past for them there. They needed a clean break. They hadn't decided whether they would live in England or America, but both knew that as long as they were together, they would be happy. They'd been apart too much to ever take what they had for granted. They wouldn't be parted by silly arguments, even though they knew there would be a few.

"I really really love you Neela, and I will do anything to make this work," He'd said.

"I am just so sorry we didn't make it work sooner."

He had grinned, "All that means is we get to make up for lost time."

A few people had decided to visit County once more. Carter was here, as were Luka and Abby. Some people Neela and Ray didn't know, Doug and Carol Ross, had also come. The three couples talked for a while, by the admit desk, as they waited for Carter who had gone upstairs to ask after any positions. Carter walked back with a smile on his face. All these people he'd seen working together, he'd been friends with all of them. He was extremely happy to see them all having their own happy endings.

"I am pleased to inform you I am now the new Chief of the ER. Moretti resigned a couple of weeks ago apparently."

"Carter, I'm so pleased for you," Carol said.

Luka smiled, "Its good to know the ER will have someone capable at it's helm."

Carter nodded and smiled. Then Archie Morris walked over, "Hey Carter, you set the tone!"

Carter looked at Doug, and they both burst out laughing. Carter maybe had a chance to measure up to Greene, but Morris... he was meant to play a different character.

"Thanks Morris!"

"What? What did I say?" Morris asked, as Ray patted him sympathetically on the back.

They all made their way out to the ambulance bay. "Well, see you all... don't be strangers," Carter said.

They all nodded, but already their minds were drifting off to their new lives. The ones they had just waiting for them.

Ray and Neela made their way to the El', planning to visit their old apartment once before he went with her on a visit to England. Neither of them could keep the smiles off their faces.

Carter turned back to the building he'd come to as an Intern. So many years had passed since that scary day. And now he was back.

"I've missed you," he said quietly.

**A/N Wow! This turned out longer than I'd expected!!! And not the most songy song-fic... But I hope you liked it anyway! Reviews, as always, are extremely welcome!**


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